Life Accomplishment #3

[rubah]

Alright, so those of you from EoFF are probably tired of hearing about this, but I finally donated blood yesterday.

Those familiar with my antics through the years might remember the first failure of a time that I tried to give blood. That was junior year when I signed my name on a list ready to do my 17-year-old duty, and sat in anxiety all day only to have the moment of truth never come for me. It did for everyone else, but not me. I cried harder at having been overlooked than I did fear of the needles.

The second time was the next year. This time, I made it to the blood suckin' room, read the paperwork, and sat down to take an iron test. This was where I started crying and the room started swaying because I was so scared. The lady noticed my evident distress and forbade me from donating. Again, I was foiled.

At freshman orientation, I got the first shots since like I don't know, 7th or 8th grade. I'm afraid I made a fool of myself, but thankfully I had a very sympathetic nurse to talk me into calmness.

Then this year, I sat in on an Alpha Phi Omega meeting where they were discussing an upcoming drive, and while I was less than impressed with APO, I made a note in my mind to consider donating. I had a boyfriend for moral support and a prescription for mental stability, could I overcome the crippling fear?

I had actually decided against it when walking out of the cafeteria, Stu said he needed to pick up a lab manual from the union bookstore, and that reminded me the drive was going on in the union right then and when I realized the rest of the day was free for me, I suggested we go do it.

I picked a flower for extra comfort, and went through the rigamarole once more. No, I haven't had sex with a gay dude, no I haven't been in india or europe for five years.

Then, the moment of truth arrived. Could I survive the iron test? The nurse remarked that the flower I had was a Rose of Sharon, and I admitted readily to her that I was afraid of being nervous, and she did an admirable job of distracting me. I tried to use the rhythmic breathing meditation techniques I use to go to sleep better by, but stu was rubbing my other arm so I had to make him stop first so I could concentrate on it xD

I don't know if accepting the pinprick made it hurt less or if it had been placed in a less painful spot(same finger), but it didn't seem as bad as the last time. My vision had gone a little dark, but I wasn't crying, so I felt a little more confident about The Real Thing.

Stu had a class at 2, so he waited around long enough to see someone put me on a cot and start hooking me up before he jetted. I didn't feel drained or weakened by his absence as I've done some times in the past.

I didn't want to hint at any distress to this woman, because I was determined to go through with this vampiric process, so I answered her questions about my state of mind and body truthfully but scant.

I asked questions and learned she was required to scrub down my injection site for 30 seconds, but is that so useful when you walk away for another minute? I don't know.

It hurt to go in, I didn't watch it. I stared off to the side afraid I was about to drop the ball I was given to squeeze. My arm was going to sleep so badly, and it didn't really improve when the lady loosened the tension around the upper arm.

I looked down and there was a deep red-violet, burgandy, warmth flowing across the piping taped to my wrist. I was pleased it had already started so well. I couldn't watch it very long because my stomach started to turn, so I focused on squeezing the hell out of that little ball, but my fingers were heavy and wouldn't work, so I had to settle for spinning it around slowly in my hand.

Eventually the pain went away and my fingers started to work, and it was so peaceful, but soon the bag was filled, the flow staunched, and a physical misery equal to if not greater than the original was upon me. However, the deed was done, and I acquiesced readily to change in posture. Thinking back to when Hannah was giving, I asked for a drink and sipped some icy dr. pepper.

Of course they were out of the appropriate size of t-shirt, but whatever, we can do some mods at home. The zebra cake I had after managing to get up was simply delicious, but almost too difficult to eat.

I had a long walk back to Yocum, and I had to stop to rest and finish eating my sunflower seeds (shelled), but I made it.

Sent an IM to stu who was worried that I hadn't made it back yet, he came and hugged me, and we napped.

Thinking of someone at Washington Regional getting my unit of blood made me cry the first two times, and my eyes are glistening now.

I just don't know when I'll be able to do it again.

Comments

[yuejiao.livejournal.com]

That was beautiful. :]

I've never given blood. I can't do it.